Just write something …

Half-boiled blood

Posted in Social fabric by dearestfriend on April 20, 2007

I don’t know why I even feel the need to write it.
Something Virginia Tech shooting seems to have induced in me. A deep sense of sadness. How we are vulnerable for not only our mood swings, bad temper but also that of people around us. Not only our dear ones and known ones, but unknown ones too..
It tears heart when you see those vibrant young people’s photos flashing all across news channels. Unfortunate students, who fell prey to some senseless mentally ill person. I wish their families and friends find peace and solace. But some where we all forget one thing..Is this all byproduct of our own society? Or mental illness is some kind of bizarre state which you can acquire all of sudden. Not sure if we can really figure out what went wrong where..Every time I hear such thing, my blood boils, but I always get amazed, boiling has never caused it go out of veins, so probably it just simmers and keep half -boiling..

All we see on news is, photos of some bright individuals, who loved life and who had future plans. Who didn’t think “unpredictability of life ” can touch them ever. Whenever there is any mass loss of lives for any insignificant reason… I always sit down to ponder.. What did it all summed for those people now.. They were running to attend another class, get one more grad, better car, better career, better partner, better job.. Everything better better better.. And we all keep running..Unless we seize to run by some idiot’s bullets or by a demon called age, illness anything damn..
I know news channels make it like some feast to grab as many viewers as possible. How else you explain “insane display of videos, photos of that jerk”. Why nobody sat down thinking it could hurt people, it could induce more maniacs.. Do as average human being it gives any reprieve that he didn’t do it “out of sudden”. I don’t know why but I hate it when someone cashes on other’s sadness.
We are making hero out of ill person , While we should be mourning over the society we are heading to become.
I guess better sense prevailed and today morning I saw CNN and all other channels focusing on victims and their families. That’s last thread of support we can give them.
I am somehow handling this grief while typing this post. I have been keeping for couple of days now. Though I didn’t know anyone personally. But I do lose sleep when any senseless loss of life happens anywhere. When innocent middle class people died on local train bombing in Mumbai India last year.. I did silently mourn for days.. I don’t know just the sense that I travelled in those locals some 10-20 times, I felt I bonded to those average people struggling their way to their work every day on those busy locals…
When innocent people fell prey to Tsunami, even then i was numb.. This “snatching of life” for any reason makes me go numb..
Now this goes for people who are directly related to the loss in Vtech..
” I know it hurts endless to know the dear one is no more, it hurts to know that he or she will no more giggle, no more laugh, no more demand anything from you. But lemme tell you best thing you can cherish in your mind about them for years is ‘they all loved life, they were bright kids, and they didn’t do anything to deserve it.’ So let the tears roll, let the cheeks go wet, hold each other and assure, this is not normal way life is supposed to go.But life has to go on. Let the memories make you sad, let yourself feel as low as you inner self wants to do.. More you hold it, longer it will hurt.. Any hurt is of two kinds, one we continue refusing and it stays longer with us, it pains more to us. Other kind is which we accept with rolling tears and heavy throat and hugs to realize , life goes on… the dear one is looking to you from heaven .. And saying I love you too..”

May God bless you and all of this world



Posted in Social fabric by dearestfriend on April 10, 2007

I am going to pick out some words I love more than other in English . This is first of it..

Wikipedia deifinition of Eloquence

Eloquence (from Latin eloquentia) is fluent, forcible, elegant or persuasive speaking in public. It is primarily the power of expressing strong emotions in striking and appropriate language, thereby producing conviction or persuasion. The term is also used for writing in a fluent style.

Well its quite a terse definition. Simplest in my understanding could be, A small beggar girl saying stern ‘No’ to a pervert passerby offering money… for simple and practical meaning of anything complicated, I always resort to poverity and utter needfullness I have seen around me while in India. I love India , not for all its diverse things but for people’s zeal to “keep going and have a laugh too” even in starkest moments.
I have seen eloquence in many forms from people not required to show it off.
I had maid servant way back. Her husband had suddenly left after just months of marriage. And she and her mother-in-law (yeah strange enough) were struggling their life to live with whatever small dignity they could muster. Whenever my roomamtes and I would gift them anything , they would politely refuse saying.. They are working here , all they need is regular salary , no charity.

Then it was a rickshaw puller, I had once my way from hostel to bus stop. He asked if i could do little math for him. I said what it was. He told he needs to find how long he can use 75000 Rs (which he has saved in 15 years of rickshaw pulling), if he gave 375 each month to his son. I asked him why he needs it, He said his son is studying in engineering college and the kid works hard to pay off his education expense. He said he does 3 jobs after college. So he worried if he has time for studies.
I could n’t stop asking myself why some are so poor and some are so rich in India.

next one..
It was my maid in hostel. She had her legs bent inwards. Thats seemed like birth defect. She was around 50 or 60 years of age. But you would get amazed by the speed and perfection she cleaned your room. She was only maid who never took excuse of illness to feign off work, in whole of two years I stayed. I would often ask her to leave my room unlcleaned. She would just joke ..”Bai.. mera kaam chenne kaa irada hai ?” (means Madam, you want to snatch my work?)

I dont know If i find poor people more approachable or more personable.. But I am surprised all the three acts of eloquent human behaviour I could remember was exhibited by them.

May You rest in peace Anna!

Posted in Social fabric,Wisdom by dearestfriend on February 22, 2007

I have been thinking about undue coverage media is giving to Anna Nicole Smith and her untimely death.

I was never big fan of her. And I know too little to say she was good or bad as a professional. And I choose not to comment about people ‘s personal choices. But this has gone beyond “way too out of control”.

There is 6 month’s old baby, whose mother died for whatever reasons. She has 4 fathers fighting for her. And I don’t know how much money people are eyeing here. Materialism to the extent that dear ones are fighting over the “dead-body” ..where to bury it 😦

Sad! very sad. To hear that Dear ones care so much that they let the dead body decay, while they fight. What an “affection simulated by money” can create in your life. So much affection , that they wouldn’t let your burial happen. and let you decay. I am no one to say, your way of life was wrong or right. But i feel pity for the kid you have left behind. I wish someone gives sense to those greedy “loved-ones”.

Anna, Your death gives me one lesson and I think other also can take that lesson.

Never leave your child unattended in hands of people who are with you just for your money.